Word List 40

This is a story with the forced usage of all the words in GMAT Wordlist 40! Because, why not.

The leaves quivered gently even as the cool redolent drafts caressed them with a motherly affection providing redress after the blazing heat of the noon. The ebbing slivers of light refracting from the broken pane adorned the refectory floor soothing the senses with its mildness- a pleasant respite from the reek of stale bread permeating the room. The refractory mouse scampered past the mouse-trap gingerly refraining from disturbing the week old piece of cheese. Outside, the tea-stall owner sat scrubbing his kettles in a desperate attempt to refurbish them to their once regal refulgent glory but the ebony of time hardly ever bows to the redundant acts of man; yet while hope remains man perseveres –that is his wont and his strength. Far off under the cool shade of the banyan sat the village bard regaling a throng of young urchins to a regimen of tales of regattas and regeneration and many a intriguing regicides of yore that he reminisced from his childhood. A rejuvenated expression illuminated his countenance even as he quelled an occasional rejoinder here and a quibble there and continued to enthrall his audience with lores of redoubtable wars and relegated kings. His repertoire with its myriad flavors evidently found great approval with his audience. Further down the shore two kids sat munching the remnants of their lunch-pack while the crows cawed in remonstration, seeking their fair share. Their remuneration came in the form of a hurled stone from the young lad. The calm was soon lost as trumpets rend the silence announcing the arrival of a procession of gaudily dressed revelers going to a marriage ceremony. A herd of cows joined the rendezvous from the side with their rendition of bovine emotions, reneging the revelers a passage to pass. A few renounced the road to escape the onslaught only to get rents in their garments from the roadside brambles. The angry demands of reparation from the revelers only drew a remorseless repartee from the cattle-driver. While the altercation continued people started to repine and long for the repast while others made a beeline for the nearby liquor store to replenish their supplies. Away from the melee, near the repository Aman sat poring over the newspaper. A surge of anger suffused through him as he went through the reprehensible and heinous acts of violence by the reprobate which had apparently drawn a strong and useless reprobation from the authorities. Repressing an overwhelming desire to tear the paper in two and cry out in repulsion and repugnance he reminded himself it was only a reprieve and he would be out of here in no time. But deep inside he knew there would be reprisals – they will requite this deed, they surely will. The cool redolent breeze still blew through the leaves but to his ears the sound was nothing more than a requiem. This was a lot more impactful when i thought it out- believe me.It is supposed to be the first chapter of a very serious book/movie.It is supposed to be philosophical and slowly coming to the topic which is much more severe than the frivolities described before.And the end is supposed to be ironic. Anyway....

Lessons From Germany

1. Always pee before you go out anywhere.They charge you Rs 30 for a leak and in someplaces twice that amount!! Thats a bit more than 1 liter of orange juice!!It doesnt feel right to have to pay more for the end product than the raw material.
2. Dont put cooked vegetable in a covered bowl and place it on a chair in the corner of the room.You tend to forget about it and are then reminded of its existense by a innocent draft of wind which kind of chokes you with the lethal aroma it picked up on its way over the bowl. Then you suddenly realise why that one fly had come to reside with you the day before and in yet another naive move you lift the lid of the bowl. The next thing you know is waking up in the hospital.
3. Mixing dal and vegetables and cooking them together and then pretending that it is a soup is ok.
4. At first try to impart taste to the vegetable with judicious use of spices. But then if it doesnt work out, as is the case in more than one occassion just add ghee and be done with it. It takes care of everything.
5. If you ride a bicycle after many days, specially if the seat is a bit too high dont do it for too long.
6. They should add Maggi and Aloo Bhujia to the first aid box. A man dying from starvation wants nothing more.And achar to make even self-cooked stuff edible!!!
7. If you buy a bottle of wine you should have a corkscrew, else all you get is a pretty bottle sitting on your table which is not really what you paid for really.
8. You can drink tap water anywhere. You are an Indian-it is one of those appurtenances (ya i m learning new words, hence...and by the looks of it still stuck on 'A'..its a long way before I get to Z...zzzzz..i think that explains the connotation of zzzzzz...as a reference to sleep, u know coz u r done then so..) that you get along  with your nationality. The bacteria simply enter the blood stream and say to each other 'Scope!' and slit their wrists.
9. Your head is a messed up place. Dont go too far in. U never know what u will find. Btw I found that last cookie in the packet of papad - I dunno how it got there - I thought I had put it in the drawer. It was a bit soggy though but still ...
10. If you think your jeans needs to be washed just keep it separate for sometime- after sometime it somehow looks very clean and wearable ...dunno how this works ..maybe relativity...
11. Never ever go to a german restaurant.They serve crap at the rate of gold. They probably think if the color is same so should be the rates.
12. You cannot abuse anyone for the terrible omlette you made, putting in a whole lot of salt pretending to be an expert chef who knows exactly how much salt makes it taste good. You sure do miss those three words ' Mummy khana do' or in case of the hostel 'Aaj tatti bana hai'.
13. Nikelodeon thinks that the only cartoon ever made was Spongebob Squarepants. There is even a channel which keeps showing a potato shaped character doing something or the other 24*7. 
14. I have had so much carrot in the past few weeks that I can feel my ears along with my two front teeth growing longer  and everytime I see a hole in the ground I feel like jumping in and join my fellow rabbits. Maybe I will see Wonderland and the Chesire Cat.

To be continued....

Some Awesome one-liners/comments

1. 'DevD is important but it is not google' - Mayank (Sharma probably..dunno..yes and i must acknowledge that this was an excellent sm from someone who is not on my list of top ten people with an excellent sense of sm's)
2. 'Abe bachpan me bhi mujhe Schrodinger equation nahi aati thi to kya us samay main sota nahi tha kya?'-once again our unequivocal king of one-liners Mayank Sharma when someone suggested that he should dedicate the night to study for the exam on the morrow as currently he was only as well acquainted with the concept as he was with  the composition of rocks on Mars.
3. 'Abe ye srojinder equation thoda samjha na'- contemporary genius Raunak Jain
4. 'Is laash ko thikane laga do'- Matti after NCC camp and referring to his legs.
5. 'Kitni haggi shakal hai be teri' - Shit in his indigenous shit style to ulti daya infi tatti
6. 'Mujhe hai daalna' - the ending line to a gem of a poem by Shit
7. 'I also dont like this chair over here' - Moharir sir ( u will get this one only if u were there when he said this) with the faint twitching of the corner of his mouth indicating his immense joy at being able to being able to use his favourite weapon-sarcasm.
8. 'U dont look like a hero' - once again Moharir sir.Hail Fatta King. 
9. 'SIX!!!...mera matlab fuck!!!'- me on being suddenly awoken. Dunno. No explanation.
10. 'Lagta hia prof ki maut ho gayi hia' - once again me .included in this list only becoz the prof was standing right behind me and tapped my shoulder and replied - ' I am here only'.
11. 'I am bored' - CV on someone's presentation
12. 'Abe agar mera chutiya kata to iska matlab yehi na ki main ab kam chutiya reh gaya' - Matti.
13. 'Abe jahar hag ke aaya hai kya??' - Chari to Matti
14. 'Lekin ye sab to shayad hum decide karenge na' - Chari in a totally innocent tone when the guy at the beach chalked out our schedule and expenses even before you can say put(or some other short word :P )
15. 'Choooooooootiyaaaaaaaaa hai kya' - i need not tell u who :D

I cant remember more at the moment but i m pretty sure that there are a countably infinite number of more such examples. They will be updated as soon as i chance to stumble upon them in some corner of my head which, by the way ,I have a lot of time to visit and explore.

Appendix to the last Post

I had Johnny Walker yesterday. Just to fortify my comments on the brand in my erstwhile post. No i aint turning into an alcoholic. I just went to a restaurant and saw it on the menu within affordable range and recognized that I could make my fortress of belief impregnable by interfering with my blood composition once again just for the sake of vindication. And I stand by my assertion : In small quantities alcohol is useless and in large quantities it tends to cause 'not-so-good' feelings. Its useful only in 2 exceptions- its too cold outside and u need to spend the night outside or if there is a party and u wish to go berserk. From now on I would prefer to be the person sitting on the same table with friends sipping free sprite and amuse myself with the antics of his fellow-sippers.

And these Germans have no taste.They eat crap. They eat food  like what would be the first stage of processing for a normal Indian dish. Yesterday i just had a stupid big (toooo big)  potato boiled, cut in half,cream poured over it with some leaves- they dint even take off the skin!!! basically saala aloo chokha tha wo bhi bana ke nahi diya tha!!!! I felt like a goat eating grass off a field who was lucky enough to have pulled hard at some shrub and found a boiled potato in the roots.

I liked bowling though. it is fun. And German TV is good.

PS: I realized the PhD guy is like the future version of Behera.Shit.

A Letter to an old acquaintance

Dear Alkohol,

I hate u. From the bottom of my heart. I loathe u.I hate u in all variety,size,color, odour,taste and packaging...maybe i like the packaging..but otherwise i hate u.I dont care if u r a Johnny Walker or Crappy Cripple. I have been enlightened now and i realise that u r useless and would like to see no more of u.

First you dont taste good.No.Never. Munchings and snacks have to take the responsibility of killing your taste. Its only when we become numb and cant taste u anymore that it becomes alright. 

And whats with the hoodwinking people by coming in so many useless varieties - beer, vodka,wine,whisky blah blah....We being the fools that we are we just walk into the trap and are like 'chal yaar aaj ye try karte hian'. Its all crap. There is no different drink.Its the same u in ur one of the many putrid tasting reincarnations. Burn in hell Agent of Debauchery. (i think they do -there would be a lot of those flame shots in hell i guess...dats what hell is all about isnt it...though i dunno why has hell got to be burning and red?? maybe they spill a lot of flame shots and take pics in the sunset mode).

Then i tend to get carried away and drink a whole lot of u and then talk rubbish and do weird stuff (thats the only good part , i would say). But soon i get nauseated and all the fun is lost as I feel like all the water is gone from my body and am about to die. Then someone hs to help me to my room before or after which I turn the contents in my inside out which I assure u is not the best of experiences to say ther least.

Where did I get enlightenment from?? No,I dint sit beneath any banyan tree ...I just had a vial of truth...literally. 500ml of wine inside me did the trick. With that amount of alcohol mucking up my blood composition I went kaput. In the haze I remember having tried to call her like a zillion times but my phone refused to connect me but like a perfect money sucking network provider, reduced my account balance to zero (this is how these people get rich-fuck them!!).Then I dutifully went to the WC (water closet-thats what these germans call the heaven where we can eject all our secretions and excretions and get ready to reduce another batch of nutrients into stinking deposits which often turn into manure in our farmlands thereby increasing the fertility of mother nature-dunno what mother nature likes about it but then everyone is entitled to his own taste- and helping us grow more and more material to turn into a heap of stinking agglomerate- life is a beautiful and smelly cycle, isnt it ? :) )....so yea WC it was where I gave birth to the Alkohol's son -The Puke-3 times and then finally passed out on my bed. Suddenly woke up like a jack-in-a-box at a most uncomfortable 2:30 am to find the TV  still running in mute, the light still on and me having no clue as to my co-ordinates. Slowly as lady comprehension and sir realisation touched my inner soul and the light of understanding swept across my mind I once again embraced the tangible world. 

The TV being still on was actually a good thng ;). I took joy in entertainment as provided by the cable company at that holy hour and then turned to MTV (yes no typo here) and let the songs play while I went off to sleep. However I dint recede into the comfort of slumber untill 5 and then finally switched off the TV and snored peacefully till 8-30. On my arrival to the world from dreamland ( where also I watched some strange yet interesting episodes) I found the last half a glass of Poison still there on the table which I vehemently flushed down the sink where it once again got assimilated in the vermin from which it  arose.

And hence the Devil was defeated. (U may not really see how but it makes a good ending line so dont crib)

Grumble grumble :D

Its not done!!why me of all people??How many times has it happened to you that you reach a counter after sweating in the sun for hours only to find the guy behind the counter , totally impervious to your clamour to invoke the milk of human kindness, bang close the counter on your face and go off with an unspoken " Fuck you!". This might be an exaggeration to what might have happened to me yet it conveys the message pretty clearly, doesnt it? You stand in a queue after almost one year in a bank to get your passbook updated and the printer runs out of ink or simply refuses to work as soon as it is your turn. You go running to a station counter for tickets and the guy tells you its already 8 and the system doesnt work after that and listlessly turns the age-old stained computer monitor on your face and points to the watch as evidence, which like any well behaved clock in the locality shows you the time 8:00pm. Even before you can realise that the clock will obviously show the time and that it is no proof that the sytem has stopped vending out tickets the guy is gone with the smoothness of a spectre mingling into the darkness. You stand there staring and cursing under your breath or maybe you are not so subtle if you are the brash type.

More often than nought its not a matter of sheer impunity but of chance and you are left wondering what could you have possibly done to be among the elite few to be a a part of the event.You go running to the mess very late hoping to get something when you find the last piece of pakoda being picked up by the person in front.Today for example everything was going smooth until I got there. Somehow the heater just went cold as it was my turn. Had Dushyant been there he would have commented in his concerned tone" Abhi tak to acha bhala garam tha. Achanak thanda kaise pad gaya?" :D .

Chalo koi baat nahi aise bhi bahut din se blog update nahi hua tha.isis bahane kar diya.

A Discovery!!!

Its weird how adages and idioms tend to come alive right in your face without you even knowing when it happened and you can see the "wise" ones staring at you with a pompous and sanctimonious smirk ethched right across their guileful faces.However its nothing so serious really, just my imagination runs a bit wild and exaggeration is fun- thats all.There was no wise man staring down on me or anything ,even if there was it was me myself in my saintly avatar (to be imagined with a flowing white beard and a halo and rudraksh mala and all). Talking of rudraksh i think that was a movie- a crappy one at at that...digressing a bit ...what is the difference between crappy poop and poopy crap???...anyway hey and do you know what is the deo that saints like??it is rudr-axe!! Do not stare at me like that ..it is a good pj...budding artists are never appreciated unless they get hold of some award which you never heard of but people tell you is a prestigious one and then you start liking the very same work that you wouldnt have given a damn about a day before.....its the same with movies -some group of weirdos decide to call some movie a classic and "tasteful" individuals devour them like bees on honey.I am not saying that all of the classic movies are like that but most of them are...and i am not open for an argument on that!!Specially if you cant decipher head or tail of a movie then the movie is guaranteed to make it to the "classics" roster. Also modern art...I mean what is it??I f I throw a dozen colours around on a canvas it isnt art but when the same thing is done by the "acknowledged" artists it means something "deep" which "you wont understand". If I draw a nude its perversion if they do it is art....damn injustice thats what it is.These guys are just good at mass hypnosis thats all.

Anyway why did I start this post?Oh yeah..its nothing as I told you in the beginning.Just that a professor was harping too much on the fact that we need to get to get a certain book or else he will slit us open or something like that..I think it wasnt so gory but who cares..and I tried to get the book from many seniors but couldnt ..I even thought of buying it but the shop was closed- talk about being pulled back by fate at every step - or you can be a bit less melodramatic and blame it on my ill timed endeavours, whichever suits you.However after all this I remembered that there is a place for people like me (not a mental asylum...let me complete the statement) who are looking for books they dont have but need very urgently-it is called The Library-the ethereal sacred ( i thought i would use the word ecclesiastical but then it would be too obvious that I picked it up from the thesaurus..moreover I dont even know how to pronounce it or if the usage would be correct) morgue of the dead trees of yore, and I did find the book there!!So you see pretty mundane this whole thing was...

You see the I never thought of the library because it simply doesnt suit my interiors- the library hates my guts literally -every time I step in there ,within 5 minutes the pressure in my large intestine ( I think its that) starts building up without any provocation whatsoever and as soon as I walk out its normal once again.So you see its natural that I did not think of it before.Thats all for the moment i guess...I will notify you in case of any such further developments.

P.S- I think my cycle is missing again.

P.P.S-P.S I love you is too full of senti...it is not as good as people make it sound like.

Fuck

Think I blew it..damn...After coming so far ..I was almost sure ..why did it have to be this way??Why asshole why?just shat over it..all over ...it stinks from far off ...ass...Seems like I ran with the speed of light around a tree...damn the 4th law.

Finally cooling off, forgiving yourself aint an easy task ..you cant even kick yourself in the ass and you dare not ask anyone else..he might just take the thing a bit too far for my own comfort..after all its my own ass. cover your ass and run or was it cover your head??

Attained room temperature or approaching it from the right in accordance to Newton's Law of Cooling ....Newton again!!why do you always pop up at every fucking place and screw with others??this reminds me of a terrific Murphy's Law "Get hold of a guy's balls and his mind and soul will follow":D..not that it has any connection with this post..just remembered it from someone else's status message ...

Anyway back to square one the fearless traveller (that being me) moves ahead with renewed vigour and determination...(just to make it sound dramatic)...back to his awesome ways because "There is no charge for awesomeness"....If you are lost as to what am I saying do not worry ,I just wanted to use the statement :P

Paila Paila Post

Dear Blog(I am guessing that is how you start a blog given its diary counterpart)…I have no idea why I did this but I have finally created a blogging account (cheers..whoooo clap clap!!!) and this is, as is quite obvious my first post.Come on, dont expect me to come up with smart and interesting lines now, I am new and nervous…naah …just kidding …I dont have anything smart up my sleeve rite now (is it rite now or write now??…rite now i hope…ohh sorry it is right now…damn these sms habits).And anyway its 3 in the morning and I need to sleep ,not that I am sleepy but then The Book of Protocols dictates that I should.And its not as if I am doing anything worthwhile anyway..might (yeah got this one correct!!) as well turn off my system and restore my tissues.
Dont blame me if you dont like the post ..I never asked you to read it in the first place…”no one is going to read anyway my son” -says the Great Inner Voice…”ya thanks..you dont have to rub it in or as one of my friend says ghoshe dhokate hobe na “
And also dont critisize my formatting skills…and shut up Mr Inner Voice.